What's in a goal?

“If your dreams do not scare you,

they are not big enough.”

Sunday after we got home from all of the celebration and unpacked, I figured I could squeeze in my last long run before race day while the girls napped. To say I wasn't excited is a bit of an understatement. I so badly wanted to crawl in bed to nap with them and pretend that my running shoes weren't waiting for me. I've had a lot of pain since my last long run and it was windy and raining. My two least favorite words when it comes to running (and two favorite when it comes to napping). I am running with a patellofemoral strap so I was holding out hope that this would do the trick to ease the pain so I could get a good run in to make up for my last sub-par performance. I had 10 miles to cover and an hour and a half before Norah needed me back, so out the door I went.
It was just the run I needed. My friend Kellie keeps telling me, "the hay is in the barn." It doesn't matter what the next few days bring because all the prep work is done. My body gets this, but my mind wasn't there yet.
The trail, the rain and the silence were the only things I needed to re-focus. I am usually a fair-weather friend to running. Not too hot, not too cold, and definitely not in the elements...that is why they invented treadmills. However, the rain was very calming and most of my run was on the trail so the trees helped shelter me. It was a great chance to convince my mind that my body was ready. I finished, feeling tired and sore, yet almost euphoric.
So, my last long run for this race is done. Only 5 more easy miles lay between me and the start line. I am as nervous as ever, but as ready as I can be. So in order to calm my nerves, I've been focusing on my goals. What's in a goal? I originally had a time in mind that I wanted to beat. My last run was at an 8:55 pace so I decided that a 2:10:00 finish- (a 9:55 pace) would be a respectable finish for me. However, after considering what time would make me "happy" I realized time didn't matter at all. To a serious athlete, it may be all about the finish, but to a mother of 3, it's all about the start. Toeing the start line, to me, is as important as toeing the finish line. I set a goal to do a half marathon, on Saturday I will have done it. Besides, my three biggest motivators to run aren't old enough to tell time yet anyway.