When Mark asked what I wanted for Christmas, I told him I wanted to check in to a gym membership. While some of my friends are closing their gym memberships and buying treadmills, I am doing the exact opposite. A few months ago my treadmill developed a slip in the belt, and though we have adjusted, tweaked, and adjusted some more, we can't get the skip out. I have loved having a treadmill and just walking downstairs to get a workout in. For the last 7 years it has allowed me to squeeze in workouts while babies napped, workout in the morning until the girls wake up, or allow me to sneak an extra workout in without feeling like I am missing out on being with them since I could answer their questions or watch them play while I ran. As lovely as that has all been though, it has also allowed a million excuses as to why I should cut a workout short or not workout at all. Afterall, even if the girls only need help with 1 or 2 things while I am running, take that times 3 kids and I am starting and stopping my run 6 times during a workout. Naps are inconsistent, girls wake up earlier than expected, or the stuff that needs done around the house take precedent over a workout. Running in my basement does not allow me the escape that I have learned to appreciate as an outside runner. When I run outside, I feel like I am actually leaving my stress behind and finding clarity for the day ahead. When I run in the basement I can still hear the phone ring, the laundry buzz, the girls argue. But, as many times as I have thought going to the gym would be nice, I worried that I would miss out on what was happening at home.
The girls are old enough now that I am noticing if I want to be a good parent I need to leave them more. I know that sounds crazy, but they need to see there is more to my life than just them. Does that sound awful? I want them to know what it means to be healthy. What it means to work hard for something. What it means to be independent. I joined the MAC. With a 24 hour access location minutes from our house I have been able to wake up early and get a workout in before there is even anybody else there. I have gotten home before the girls wake up, so I haven't felt the guilt of missing out on time with them. I also greet them in the morning awake and ready for anything they throw my way. I am sure the ease of this will become a bit more complicated when I get back to school, as the last week of working out I have been on break, however, I am hopeful that having a week to get some workouts and routine under my belt will help me transition to the 4:30 wake up call that will allow me to workout and get home and ready before I wake the girls at 6:15. I am excited to start my day off alert and ready for anything with a few miles already under my belt.
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