Moving

We're moving. It's a source of stress like all moves are, but this seems bigger than that. We have been planning to move for 2 years. Last year we even loaded up a trailer of our things and planned to put an offer in on a house and then we found out the news about Will and decided best to control what stress we could and stay put. Now that we plan to move we aren't just leaving behind our house, we are leaving behind the place we first brought our children home. We brought 4 into this house and we are leaving with 3. There aren't really words to explain it, but its an added dimension that makes this move a bit more emotional than it would be otherwise. 

I am ready to leave this house. It's not a happy place for me anymore. However, I feel forever connected to it as well which makes me not want to leave it. Could I contradict myself any more? I could stay in this house forever provided that I worked full time. The house doesn't bother me so long as I'm not in it alone. When I'm here alone, the silence is deafening. I've always heard this phrase, but now I understand it too well. It's so quiet in the house that my ears ring and in the ringing I hear Will crying. I've never been more thankful for our crazy dog to add a little chaos to the afternoon.

Moving was a big decision and the last thing we wanted was to add more stress to the girls after they've had such a big year already. So, I asked Will for help. Am I crazy?! I asked him to help put my heart at ease by opening the doors we were supposed to walk through. Amazingly, we are moving to a beautiful home in the location we wanted that had been on the market for over a year. It's like it was waiting for us to be ready for it. The owner is incredible. He had me at, "I don't know why people make moving so stressful...it should be fun." We made the [very un-like us] decision to put an offer on it before we put our own house on the market. It went right through. We cleaned, painted, cleaned some more and decided to try to sell our house FSBO. We put it on the market and within the week we had 2 offers. It's so bitter-sweet. A month from today we will close the door on this house for the last time.  Though I'm so sad at the memories we leave behind here, I'm thankful that it seems to be the right move.