Each year I choose one little word to help guide my year. It has always been pretty clear to me which word to choose, however, this year, I am stuck between two. I have learned so much over the past year on Joy and Perspective and feel like now that I have a better understanding of them, I want to use them to help guide the year ahead. So, I'm throwing out the rules and combining them to enter this new year with the words, Joyful Perspective.
Most of the perspective I have gained this past year has come from my children. My first and favorite came from Grace when we explained to her that Will would be born with a cleft lip and that might look scary to her. Her response, "when you love someone you don't notice those things." Her wisdom at age 10 amazed me.
Once Will was born the girls immediately fell in love with him and wanted to help out in every way possible. Emma would hold Will's hand and talk to him. When I asked her what she was talking to him about she told me, "I have to tell him what things look like since he can't see them for himself." Her compassion left me speechless.
After he passed away the girls wrote letters to put into his casket. This seemed most important for Norah as helping her understand that death was concrete and irreversible was difficult. Though simple in words her letter was so complex in heart. I admired her thoughtfulness as she agonized over what to write, not wanting anyone to help her.
"Sorry about that you have to be dead. From Norah - To Will"
After spending nearly an hour writing and drawing sad faces she placed her note on the counter and Hazel jumped up and grabbed it and dropped it in her water bowl. We grabbed it out and set it out to dry, but Norah was heartbroken and went to her room. When she came out she had a piece of paper that had been taped up so that we couldn't read it and asked us if we could put that one in Will's casket too. I was worried about her, so I opened it up and read it.
"William - I'm sorry for that my dog throw the paper in the water. From Norah"
Though I thought she went to her room to cry, she went to her room to act. She wanted to make sure that Will got the very best that she could give. All four of my kids have given me such perspective this year. I hope that I can take what they have taught me and carry it into the new year with my own joyful perspective.
My Christmas present this year will serve as my constant reminder to choose joy.
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